AspieSaurus

Due to the differences between men and women, and the fact that many women with Asperger's go undiagnosed into adulthood, women on the spectrum face a unique set of challenges. Women with Asperger's Syndrome have a more difficult time with relationships than do neurotypical women, due to the lack of understanding social cues and their tendency to be too trusting.

These things can also affect Aspie women in the workplace, especially when trying to find a job. Females with Asperger's Syndrome can also have a difficult time in college, especially socially, due to pressures to socialize and form relationships, as well as the fact that their routine in constantly changed each semester.

Here is an article about the challenges that female aspies face in adult life: Women with Asperger's Syndrome

An excerpt from the article:

A lot of adult women with Aspergers go undiagnosed. The disorder is rarely diagnosed in adults, even though it is a lifelong condition, and it is often overlooked in female children. Without a diagnosis, it may be hard for a woman to get the help and support she needs. She may even run into the problem of having the people in her life not believe her when she talks about her disorder if she cannot get a proper diagnosis. By adulthood, most aspies, especially women, are able to mask their disorder and better blend in with “normal” society. While this can help make life easier, it also causes other people to not take their disorder seriously.

As most of my readers know, girls with Asperger's syndrome tend to be misdiagnosed, or go undiagnosed altogether. Asperger's and autism are generally thought of as "male disorders" that girls cannot have, or rarely have.

Here is an article about the differences between boys and girls who have Asperger's and why so many Aspie girls go undiagnosed:

Girls with Asperger's Syndrome

It is important that Aspie and Autie girls get the diagnosis so that they can get the help and support that they need to be successful later in life.

Here is a video about little girls on the specturm:



Girls with Asperger's Syndrome

When some parents find out that their child has Asperger's Syndrome or autism, or begin to suspect it, they don't know how to deal with it. Certain parents may feel ashamed or guilty that there is something "wrong" with their child, so they try to look for any other possible explanation for their child's "differences" instead of embracing their strengths. Because of this, a number of parents of children on the autism spectrum, as well as parents of children with ADHD, take solace in the New Age idea that their child is one of the "special" and more "advanced" Indigo Children, rather than getting them the actual help they need.

Here is an article explaining the similarities between Asperger's and the "Indigo Child" phenomenon: The Truth About Indigo Children and Starseeds (page 2 of the article)

If you are interested in the topic, here is a follow up to that article addressing the criticism the first article received from supporters of the "Indigo Movement" How The Indigo Child Concept Hinders Our Spiritual Advancement

I trust that the majority of Aspies are able think logically enough to not fall victim to these types of cult-like beliefs. I know it can be tempting to want to think of yourself, or your child, as being somehow superior to justify things that you might think of as a disability, but living in a fantasy world is dangerous, and it will only get in your way of actually learning how to relate to people in the world around you (which is an entirely achievable goal. It's just a little more difficult for those on the spectrum).

It can be difficult for people on the autism spectrum to find a job that they are well suited for, as well as getting past the interview when applying for a job. Though certain aspie traits can be beneficial when choosing a career, others can hold you back. Your attention to detail can make you a valuable employee, but some employers might not even give you the chance to prove yourself. Since most aspies don't have the best social skills, making a good first impression on the interviewer can be especially difficult.

Before you can attempt to find a job, you must first determine what type of career would be best for you. This article on PsychologyToday gives some pointers on choosing a career: How To Find Your Career on the Autism Spectrum

In that article, the author gives tips on choosing the career path that is best suited for your individual needs. For example, if you are a strong visual thinker, possible career choices for you would be in the fields of computer programming, web design, photography, handcrafts, etc. If you are better with numbers and facts, you might be better suited for a career in accounting, engineering, or journalism, among others. There are also career suggestions given in the article for non-verbal autistics. The article then goes on to outline the process by which you can figure out what kind of career you would like to have, which starts with listing your obsessive interests. You will, of course, need to make sure you are qualified for your chosen career path, and may need additional education.

Once you have decided on a career path, as an aspie, you may run into road blocks while attempting to get the job. Even if your resume is impressive, the interview with make or break you. Even neurotypicals can have a lot of trouble with interviews. It doesn't matter that you have a masters degree in your chosen field; employers want employees with people skills, and will generally hire the friendly, sociable person who is as dumb as a door nob over the person who is actually a hard-worker and qualified. Employers tend to hire based on emotions rather than logic.

This article outlines some of the problems that you may run into during your job search: Young adults with Asperger's syndrome struggle to find jobs
If you are mindful of the pitfalls associated with the interview and work really hard to pull it off, you just might have a chance. It may not work with all potential employers, but if you explain during the interview that you know you don't have the best people skills, but that you know that you are probably the most qualified applicant (without seeming too arrogant), you just might have a chance. You may also want to attempt to explain to them that your "weakness" is actually a "strength" (Say things such as this: since you don't have the best social skills, you will actually get your work done, as opposed to wasting valuable company time gossiping around the water cooler. You also have a great eye for detail and your obsessive nature prevents you from making careless mistakes. Try to get them to think of you as a valuable asset to the company that they couldn't possibly do without.)

There is no guarantee that you will find a job right away. Especially in this economy, even NTs are having trouble finding work. You may have to send out dozens, possibly hundreds of resumes or applications, but if you work hard, you will eventually find a job if you really want it.

Here's a video about what stimming is, and why people on the autism spectrum do it.

I found this article I wanted to share about a family with children on both ends of the autism spectrum. As always, click the link to read the full article.

Having two boys at either end of the autism spectrum can present quite a few challenges. But what happens when the functioning levels change and it starts to become obvious? Here is Part One of The Great Divide In Our House. .. .

Here's an article about crazy theories that various people have proposed about the cause of autism. The theories range from plausible to outright ridiculous (click the link under the introductory paragraph to read the full article):

Autism is still very misunderstood by the scientific and medical community, which has lead to a lot of speculation and theories with regard to its cause. Scientists still have not been able to identify the cause of autism, but that hasn’t stopped people from continuing to believe disproven theories, or to simply making up their own with no supporting evidence. From theories supported by flawed studies to outright BS, there are almost as many theories about autism as autistic individuals themselves. Here are the top ten dubious theories about the cause of Autism.

I just wanted to take the time to share a link to a wonderful forum for people on the autism spectrum and those with loved ones on the spectrum, WrongPlanet.net.

Wrong Planet is an Asperger's and Autism forum. There are boards dedicated to issues pertaining to living with autism, such as parenting, social skills, work, school, and dating, as well as boards to discuss various other interests.

Aside from the forum, Wrong Planet also has articles about autism and Asperger's and member blogs.

If you are looking for a place to meet other people on the spectrum, don't be afraid to join the Wrong Planet community. It can be hard to connect with people face to face, but talking to other people online can help a lot with social skills.

The link again is WrongPlanet.net.

People on the autism spectrum have a tendency to talk non-stop about their "special interests" or obsessions. These conversations may end up being one sided if the other person has nothing to contribute or is uninterested in the topic at hand. It may be difficult for Aspies to know if they are boring the person that they are talking to. I found this article on PsychologyToday that may be helpful for people on the spectrum in helping to determine if you should find a different topic of discussion:
Eight Tips to Know if You're Being Boring

Paying close attention to how the person you are talking to responds and contributes to the conversation, as well as paying attention to body language (which can, admittedly, be difficult for a lot of people on the spectrum) can help you to learn to communicate in a way that makes people actually enjoy talking to you.

Another sign that wasn't listed in the article is if the other person is always looking at their watch. If they are checking the time frequently, they are probably wanting the conversation to be over soon.

The tips in that article can also help NTs, as Aspies/Auties don't exactly have a monopoly on being boring. :)

Wow, it's been a while since I've updated this blog. I've been too busy to keep up with it lately with school and work. Anyway, here's a cute video I found on YouTube explaining Asperger's Syndrome.

I saw a blog post on PsychologyToday earlier today that I wanted to share. While not directly related to Asperger's Syndrome or autism, I thought that this link would be especially helpful for those on the spectrum. Even if you follow my previous advice for making new friends, it can even more difficult to maintain your newly formed friendships. Maybe the advice in this article can help:

Eight Tips for Maintaining Friendships

There are a lot of myths and misunderstandings surrounding Asperger's Syndrome and autism. Here is a link to an article that outlines some myths and facts about Asperger's:

12 Common Myths About Asperger’s Syndrome

People with Asperger's syndrome usually don't have the best social skills and making friends in college can be difficult even for NTs, and may seem almost impossible for aspies. There are some things you can do to make it easier to form social connections with other students at your college.

If you're like me, you might be tempted to just get away from campus as soon as you can when you're not in class (especially if you commute). Why would you want to stay there when you don't have to be there? But if you want to make any friends, you almost have to be on campus for at least some amount of time when you're not in class.

Most colleges have student lounges all over campus. A good way to make friends is to become a regular at a specific lounge and talk to the students there. You might find that people with certain interests tend to congregate in certain lounges. For example, gamers might all sit together in a certain area playing video games (if your college provides TVs for students. Sounds weird, but mine does) and other types of games. If you see someone who seems to have a common interest with you, go up to them and start a conversation about the topic. They might want to talk or they might not, but you will never know unless you take the risk.

If you do decide to talk to someone, try to keep the conversation a dialog rather than a monologue. If you keep going on and on about your interests, as aspies tend to do, and don't allow the other person to contribute to the conversation, they will get bored very quickly and will become annoyed with you.
This blog post from PsychologyToday might help you to make sure that you are not boring the person you are trying to talk to: Eight Tips to Know If You're Being Boring.

You also might want to join a club. Colleges usually have many student clubs that meet on campus. It shouldn't be that hard to find something you're interested in. There are usually clubs for every interest from anime to computers to religion. Clubs can be a great way to meet like-minded people with similar interests.

You can also make new friends in your classes. Classes that require you to work closely with other people, such as those that include labs, while intimidating at first, can be a great way to form relationships with other people. Classes that require discussion amongst students, such as English classes that focus on reading and discussing literature or your own original work (such as fiction or poetry writing classes) are also good if you want to make friends in classes. Certain classes that focus on physical activity, such as sports or fitness classes, may also provide an environment that makes connecting with other students easier. Asking classmates questions pertaining to classes, even lecture classes that don't allow much socializing opportunities during class time, can also help break the ice and lead to conversations about other topics.

If you aren't on social networking sites like FaceBook, it may be beneficial to create a profile. Even though FaceBook does seem pointless, it does make it easier to keep up with friends. Especially if you don't like talking on the phone, FaceBook can allow you to keep up the appearances of actually wanting to talk to people. It is also usually easier to talk to people online via social networking sites, instant messengers, and email rather than on the phone before you get comfortable around them.

Even if it doesn't seem that important to you to make friends, having social connections can greatly help you in finding a job later.

Sorry I haven't really been updating much. Spring semester just started and I have classes every day now.

Anyway, I thought I'd post a video about how students with Asperger's Syndrome make the transfer from high school to college. The video about Marshall University specifically (not my school), but should be helpful for aspie students no matter where you choose to go to school. Personally, I don't take advantage of any special needs services at my school, but some students might find that such services are helpful.

The video is almost ten minutes long.

This video contains information about women who have Asperger's Syndrome, including the experiences of a female aspie.

In 2012, the American Psychiatric Association may be doing away with the diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome from the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). Pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS) may be removed from the next edition of the DSM as well.

The proposed changes to the manual are meant to eliminate the different labels associated with autism spectrum disorders, and instead focus on the severity of a person's autism, with labels such as "most severe" and "less severe."

Some reasons the APA cites for combining all forms of autism into one broad diagnostic category are that a single spectrum is more reflective of the symptoms of autism, the separation of different conditions within the autism spectrum is inconsistent and variable, and that individuals are already often diagnosed by the severity of their symptoms rather than with a specific condition.

Some possible problems with this proposed plan to remove the diagnosis of Asperger's is that it may discourage some people from seeking a diagnosis, as some more high functioning individuals who would otherwise be diagnosed with Asperger's may not want the label of autism. It may also complicate the decisions regarding who gets government benefits, as some states will provide benefits for autism, but not for AS.

I don't really have an opinion about this either way. I don't really see Asperger's as any less stigmatizing than autism, and I don't think that this plan would really deter anyone from seeking a diagnosis. If someone's symptoms are severe enough that the really see benefits from getting a diagnosis, they shouldn't care what that diagnosis is. And as far as government benefits go, this could possibly help more people get help from the government. Of course, they could always say that only those with more severe symptoms get benefits.

The APA will also solicit feedback from the general public before any final decisions are made.

Source: No More Asperger’s Syndrome? | Psychology Today

A ten-minute documentary about autism. This video includes interviews with neurotypical and autistic individuals about how they see autism.

When you first find out that you have (or may have) Asperger's or High Functioning Autism, you may find that you want to learn how to better blend into neurotypical society, as nothing could be worse than having people see you only as your "disability" rather than as the individual you are. One easy solution is eye contact.

Eye contact comes so naturally to most NTs that they don't even think about it, but for an aspie, making and maintaining eye contact can be difficult or extremely uncomfortable

Neurotypicals expect that the people they are trying to communicate with will maintain eye contact with them, and they tend to get upset or unsettled when there is no eye contact being made. They tend to see the lack of eye contact as a sign of dishonesty or disinterest.

While simply making eye contact won't make you appear completely "normal, it can make you seem a little less "strange" to NTs. If you make a conscious effort to make and maintain eye contact, you will be able to communicate a lot more effectively and you will be able to more easily be part of society as a whole. It might take some practice at first to become comfortable with eye contact, and you will need to learn how to look into someone's eyes without seeming like you're "staring" (too much or too intense eye contact can make NTs just as uneasy as too little. I know, it's confusing).

You may want to practice eye contact while talking with someone you are very comfortable with (if any such person exists), such as a parent, sibling, friend, or lover. This will be much less intimidating than trying to look a stranger in the eyes.

If actually making eye contact is too difficult or uncomfortable, one alternative that I've found to be useful is looking at the other person's nose. When I look at a person I'm speaking to, though I can usually make eye contact now (after starting to make a conscious effort to do so a few years ago), my natural inclination is to look at their mouth (that is, after all, the part of their fact that is doing the most movement) if I'm looking at their face at all. If I think about it, I simply move my gaze up about an inch to their nose if for some reason I don't feel comfortable actually looking at their eyes. They usually won't be able to tell that you aren't actually looking at their eyes.

Here is another video from YouTube. This one is about depression and anxiety, and how they relate to Asperger's.